poarta politistii trese metal
I:De ce poarta politistii trese de metal pe ambii umeri ?R:Ca sa auda stereo.
poarta politistii trese metal
I:De ce poarta politistii trese de metal ?
R:Ca sa auda cand ploua.
R:Ca sa auda cand ploua.
poarta politistii trese metal
I:De ce poarta politistii trese de metal pe ambii umeri ?
R:Ca sa auda stereo.
R:Ca sa auda stereo.
poarta politistii manusi jegul
I:De ce poarta politistii manusi ?
R:Ca sa nu li se vada jegul de sub unghii.
R:Ca sa nu li se vada jegul de sub unghii.
poarta politistii chestiile reflectorizante
I:De ce poarta politistii chestiile alea reflectorizante pe ei ?
R:Nu mai stiu ... poate aflati voi ...
R:Nu mai stiu ... poate aflati voi ...
poarta politistii manusi indoaie
I:De ce poarta politistii manusi pana la cot ?
R:Ca sa stie de unde sa indoaie mana.
R:Ca sa stie de unde sa indoaie mana.
there beautiful princess trapped
There is a beautiful princess trapped in a castleguarded by a dragon.
Here is the end of the story with different kind of metalheads as knights.
* POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
* THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
* HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
* FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.
* VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
* DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
* BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
* GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
* GRIND METAL
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
* DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
* GOTHIC METAL
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duett by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell's eternity.
* PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
* INDUSTRIAL METAL
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes anobscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
* SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are still looking for the one who did this.
* CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to "thank" the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
* GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.
* BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.
* NU METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
* EMO
The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, He gets eaten. The princess is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.
* GRUNGE
The protagonist doesn't get eaten by the dragon because he stinks too much from not washing his hair in months. The princess won't go near him either, and he ends up dying on the town hall steps with the other mosha's due to the over consumption of white cider.
* POP-PUNK
The dragon can't eat the protagonist because he can't catch him because he keeps bouncing up and down. The princess won't fuck him either, because he likes ska.
Here is the end of the story with different kind of metalheads as knights.
* POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
* THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
* HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
* FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.
* VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
* DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
* BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
* GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
* GRIND METAL
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
* DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
* GOTHIC METAL
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duett by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell's eternity.
* PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
* INDUSTRIAL METAL
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes anobscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
* SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are still looking for the one who did this.
* CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to "thank" the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
* GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.
* BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.
* NU METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
* EMO
The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, He gets eaten. The princess is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.
* GRUNGE
The protagonist doesn't get eaten by the dragon because he stinks too much from not washing his hair in months. The princess won't go near him either, and he ends up dying on the town hall steps with the other mosha's due to the over consumption of white cider.
* POP-PUNK
The dragon can't eat the protagonist because he can't catch him because he keeps bouncing up and down. The princess won't fuck him either, because he likes ska.
intreaba trula poarta fetele
- Bula, intreaba Trula, tu stii de ce poarta fetele decolteu?
- Ca sa li se vada tatele...
- Si de ce poarta babele fustite mini?
- Din aceleasi motive!
- Ca sa li se vada tatele...
- Si de ce poarta babele fustite mini?
- Din aceleasi motive!
varianta nemultumit total prestatiile
Varianta:
Un tip nemultumit total de prestatiile propriei p*li se duce la doctor sa-si o inlocuiasca...Doctorul:
-Dom ne, n-avem decat una buna de lemn, e puternica, merge bine,etc....
I-o instaleaza astuia, face omu fericit acolo...Peste vreun an asa vine asta iar la doctor:
-Domn doctor o fi asta de lemn buna da a inceput sa scartaie, nu aveti alta mai puternica?
-Tocmai am primit un set de p*li de metal, garantate, super adevarate!
I-o nstaleaza si p-asta, face omul fericit iar...Peste vreo 2 ani iar vine asta la doctor:
-Domn doctor, or fi astea de metal, de lemn .... da tot mai buna e aia veche naturala, vreau sa-mi puneti una d aia...
Doctorul mirat:
-Da de domn le nu sunteti satisfacut de ele?
La care omu :
-Ba da domn doctor sunt satisfacut da nevasta-mea a nascut deja un pinochio si doi terminatori!
Un tip nemultumit total de prestatiile propriei p*li se duce la doctor sa-si o inlocuiasca...Doctorul:
-Dom ne, n-avem decat una buna de lemn, e puternica, merge bine,etc....
I-o instaleaza astuia, face omu fericit acolo...Peste vreun an asa vine asta iar la doctor:
-Domn doctor o fi asta de lemn buna da a inceput sa scartaie, nu aveti alta mai puternica?
-Tocmai am primit un set de p*li de metal, garantate, super adevarate!
I-o nstaleaza si p-asta, face omul fericit iar...Peste vreo 2 ani iar vine asta la doctor:
-Domn doctor, or fi astea de metal, de lemn .... da tot mai buna e aia veche naturala, vreau sa-mi puneti una d aia...
Doctorul mirat:
-Da de domn le nu sunteti satisfacut de ele?
La care omu :
-Ba da domn doctor sunt satisfacut da nevasta-mea a nascut deja un pinochio si doi terminatori!
craciun poarta costum trebuie
Mos Craciun poarta un costum rosu...
Trebuie ca e comunist...
Poarta barba si par lung...
Trebuie ca e un pacifist...
Da oare ce o fi in pipa din care fumeaza?
Trebuie ca e comunist...
Poarta barba si par lung...
Trebuie ca e un pacifist...
Da oare ce o fi in pipa din care fumeaza?
tehnologia moderna calator compartiment
- Ce ti-e cu tehnologia asta moderna, zise un calator din compartiment. Am vazut un documentar italian pe Discovery, unde arata ca la sapte dimineata intra cireada de vite pe poarta abatorului, si la sapte seara, ieseau pe poarta containerele cu conserve ...
- Ehei, dar in Japonia, la sase dimineata intra pe poarta camionul cu nisip, iar la ora 13, iese vagonul cu microprocesoarele pe baza de siliciu.
- Vax, zice Bula, uite, in orasul nostru, cam pe la 9 au inceput sa toarne fundatia la fabrica de bere si spirt, iar pe la 10 toti erau beti morti!
- Ehei, dar in Japonia, la sase dimineata intra pe poarta camionul cu nisip, iar la ora 13, iese vagonul cu microprocesoarele pe baza de siliciu.
- Vax, zice Bula, uite, in orasul nostru, cam pe la 9 au inceput sa toarne fundatia la fabrica de bere si spirt, iar pe la 10 toti erau beti morti!